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The School of Flaunt

Back when "Flying Was Fun" Alexandra Smythe and Cate Clarke were Flight Attendants with a Major International Carrier. Prior to Private Jets coming into vogue, Alexandra and Cate traveled in the First Class World, meeting and greeting the top celebrities, politicians who would become Presidents, nouveau riche, and yes the occasional Headline Grabbing Criminal in Handcuffs!

What the two ladies viewed and experienced became fodder for the School of Flaunt, so much money, such bad taste and oh those terrible manners. Something had to be done! Hence, The School of Flaunt Handbook was born. Read More

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D-Day, What Next?

Category: SOF Divas’ Diaries ®  |  Permalink

Published: Friday, September 28, 2012

 

 

 

Safely in Alabama

What next? D-Day!!!

Part III

I hadn't seen my friends in a few years and they had built a lovely new home. So I was very excited to see it. Well, it did not disappoint! Beautiful dark wood flooring throughout, Viking kitchen, and the home was decorated with all of their beautiful things collected from their travels around the world. But this wasn't like a museum. Some people have the knack to make their homes very sophisticated without being stuffy. And of course they have their copy of The School of Flaunt Handbook sitting on top of three other books on an end table. I giggled when I saw that.

Now we had a whirlwind of dinners out, yes lots of fried catfish, shrimp, oysters and French fries. Come on people we are down south and have to partake of these goodies. The husband and I are drinking lots of fine wine but my friend is not. Yikes, what is the story here?

Well, her plastic surgeon had told her no drinking for three weeks before surgery, no Advil or aspirin. Plus every time I turned around she was taking some herbal pills. What? Yes, it was called VitaMedica. The regime consisted of 4 different pills. She took multiples of each every day which she started before I came and we continued with them after surgery. Basically it is a dietary supplement for a comprehensive nutritional program to support healing after surgery. You start taking some of these before the surgery to help your body prepare for the big day and the following down time to speed up healing, slow down swelling and help with sleep!

Saturday night rolls around and who are we having dinner with? The Doc who is going to be doing the plastic surgery and his wife. I noted that he doesn't drink so we don't have to worry about hangovers or unsteady hands. Plus I had found out that he was an ear, nose and throat doctor, on staff at one of the local hospitals and basically he is the guy you want to work on your face if you are in an accident!! Plus he was very nice.

As were sitting having dinner and talking about sports, golfing, sailing etc. he makes a comment to me very quietly something to this effect, "Sweetie, (he is southern so I didn't take offense) you obviously like the sun." I smiled and said, "Well, you are right I haven't stayed out of it and I'm afraid that I do have some sun damage." Then he says, "Why don't you come into my office next week or whenever it is convenient and let me look at your skin." I'm thinking, Hmmm, well why not? Then I said I have a spot on the side of my nose that I would like you to look at. And he nods his head.

But enough about me. It is now Monday! D-Day for my BFF. Her husband and I take her over to be at the office promptly at 7:55AM. They had told her to come in her pajamas or something easy to put on after surgery to go home in. We are all chatting away like we are going to drop her off to get her teeth cleaned. No big deal, seemed to be everyone's attitude.

We take her inside the office and no one was there except for the staff. Kisses good bye and we tell her we will be back at 2 PM to take her home.

OMG! People I have never had any experiences with plastic surgery so I didn't realize that we were taking the lamb to slaughter. I think my BFF since she had seen her husband have his work done didn't think it was going to be that big of a deal either. But remember he had all of his work done in three separate procedures. She was having the whole enchilada done at the same time!!! And I found out that the work on her neck and chin was going to be three times what her husband had done. Her neck was lipo suctioned, and the doctor told us that she had a hereditary issue with lax skin. He said normally he would take out ¾'s of an inch on each side of the face but in her case he took out 1 ¼ inches on each side. And remember she also had the Ultherapy treatment done while she was under plus the CO2 laser. More about those later.

But getting back to the day. We get a phone call not to come over at 2PM to pick her up. Her blood pressure had spiked and they couldn't finish the procedures until they had that under control. We found out that the Doctor had cancelled all of his afternoon appointments so he could be with her. Finally at 6:30 PM we were rolling into their garage. I'm here to tell you the woman looked like she had been hit by an 18 wheeler.

The Doctor told us she wouldn't remember anything fortunately, not even the ride home! Now the husband thinks that we should put her in one of his leather recliners with a blanket since she wasn't suppose to have her head below her heart. Basically she was supposed to sleep sitting up! This proved to be a poor idea since there was an air vent above the chair and the cold air from the air-conditioning made her go into a violent shaking attack because she was to cold. We agreed that we had to get her into bed right then. The good news was we had prepared her bed earlier in the day with five pillows to prop her up and two more to have at her sides to put her arms on. I got my hair dryer and I'm blowing hot air under the sheets and the blanket to warm her up, while he is putting two more blankets on top of her. Thankfully she stopped shaking and said, "I need to sleep." Believe it or not she could sleep like this. Never even moved. We know because one of us was always checking her!

And then it started. The next day her right eye started to swell shut (both were black and blue and she didn't have her eyes done). Her lips were also swollen. Angelina Joline would be jealous! And of course the rest of her face was swollen and bruised. Plus she had CO 2 fractional laser work done to her forehead, around her eyes and the top of her checks. This resulted in Copper cream that needed to be applied every 3 hours to those areas because the skin would turn blackish and peel off. Think of an overcooked potato chip! ICK!

Oh my poor BFF!! We had to give her pain pills, prednisone, anti-biotic, and of course all of her herbal meds. It was something every 4 hours or three times a day! The poor baby couldn't open her mouth wide enough to get a fork with food on it into her mouth because of the swollen lips and the stitching. The only thing we could get into her for days was Ensure. The good news here was she was taking so many meds that we could get that Ensure into her on a regular basis. The Doctor had said she needed at least 1500 calories a day to heal and that was our mission.

Well, the first week was not fun! I felt so sorry for her. She was miserable but for some reason was able to still sleep sitting upright and spent the majority of time in bed sleeping. We would get her showered, wash her hair and dry it, put the copper cream on her face and then get her bandaged back up.

The husband and I would take turns getting up at 3AM and again at 6AM to give her, her meds.

She was a trooper though and would get out of bed, come out to the family room and watch a little TV with us or sit outside in the evening when the humidity wasn't to bad. She had books to read but because the right eye was swollen shut and basically she was exhausted not much reading got accomplished. We finally got some mash potatoes into her, apple sauce and then mashed sweet potatoes.

Meanwhile between making sure she was getting her meds, applying Copper cream and frozen peas for her face; yes, bags of frozen peas that we put into cloth bags to help with the swelling on her face, I'm reading a lot and watching TV shows that I had only heard about. The husband is working out of the home, cooking for me (thank you Lord!) and it seemed like every five seconds looking in at his sleeping wife. I might add here that he made a great meat loaf and we finally got her to eat a little of that with some mashed potatoes. He and I were almost high fiving one another over that!

One last thought, my God people I'm here to tell you that there is so much dribble on the TV now it is amazing!! We'll talk about that later!

To be continued

Alexandra

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