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The School of Flaunt

Back when "Flying Was Fun" Alexandra Smythe and Cate Clarke were Flight Attendants with a Major International Carrier. Prior to Private Jets coming into vogue, Alexandra and Cate traveled in the First Class World, meeting and greeting the top celebrities, politicians who would become Presidents, nouveau riche, and yes the occasional Headline Grabbing Criminal in Handcuffs!

What the two ladies viewed and experienced became fodder for the School of Flaunt, so much money, such bad taste and oh those terrible manners. Something had to be done! Hence, The School of Flaunt Handbook was born. Read More

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You did WHAT with the Coffee Grounds?

Category: SOF Divas’ Diaries ®  |  Permalink

Published: Wednesday, December 7, 2011

Coffee Grounds


You did what with coffee grounds?

It was a few days after Thanksgiving and I was admiring my holiday decorations and doing some of that last minute fluffing of bows when the phone rang. It was LB and she was on a roll!

LB: "What are you doing?"

Moi: "Just taking a final walk through of my Xmas decorations and making notes on how many Poinsettias I need for the house. So how are you?"

LB: "Well, you aren't going to believe what I did?" At this point in our relationship nothing she could do would surprise me.

Moi: "What now?"

LB: "Well, I was watching a show the other day and one of those talking heads was telling the audience that coffee grounds are great for exfoliating and I just heard that Coconut butter is also wonderful for wrinkles."

Moi: "Coffee grounds and coconut butter? Are you cooking while you do this?"

LB: "O.K. smarty pants, they said this really works. And I've done a test to see."

Moi: "A test? What kind of test."

LB: "Well, I got in the shower with my coffee grounds and rubbed and then scrubbed them only on one side of my body. That way I could tell if the one side was actually smoother than the other. Then I decided to do my face too only on the one side so if I had a reaction on my face only one side would blow up."

Moi: "Terrific! That was good thinking about your face."

LB: "I thought so too. But you know the problem with those coffee grounds? They are hard to rinse off."

Moi: "Just for your information. Did you know that if you have a septic system, which you do, that you aren't suppose to put coffee grounds down the drain either, because you don't want them to go into your septic?"

LB: "Oh Gawd, no I didn't. Don't tell the Donald." (Her husband)

Moi: "You know what is said on this phone, stays on this phone."

LB: "Well, I don't think I'm going to try it again, even though I really think it makes your skin so soft. They said it would. Something about the oils in the coffee. But here's the problem."

Moi: "Do tell."

LB: "Well, I got out of the shower and was toweling off when I looked at my armpit in the mirror. I looked like a woman from a third world country."

At this point I started laughing and she did too! I couldn't help myself now -

Moi: "And what about the rest of your privates? And under your breasts? Did you check for grounds there too?"

LB: "Now you want too many details!" Both of us are laughing so hard at this point that I've got tears in my eyes!

Moi: (I finally get through with laughing,) "So where does the Coconut Butter come into this equation?"

LB: "Well, after I stopped smelling like a warm cup of coffee, I put coconut butter on my face."

Moi: "OMG, and how is that working for you?"

LB: "Great! I love it! Now that part of this I think I'm going to continue doing."

Moi: "So where did you learn about this coconut butter for wrinkles?"

LB: "At a garage sale."

Moi: "A garage sale?"

LB: "I know, you told me before it is tacky to pull up in my Benz, with my Chanel bag and the good jewelry on but I just couldn't resist."

Moi: "O.K., get back to the garage sale and the coconut butter."

LB: "I don't know how it happened but I got into a conversation with this man who looked like he was an American Indian and he told me he uses coconut butter around his eyes and mouth for wrinkles. And I'm here to tell you his skin looked wonderful!"

Moi: "Alright, sign me up for the coconut butter."

LB: "I already did. I bought some for you and me."

Moi: "Oh thank you sweetie!"

That's what friends are for!


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