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The School of Flaunt

Back when "Flying Was Fun" Alexandra Smythe and Cate Clarke were Flight Attendants with a Major International Carrier. Prior to Private Jets coming into vogue, Alexandra and Cate traveled in the First Class World, meeting and greeting the top celebrities, politicians who would become Presidents, nouveau riche, and yes the occasional Headline Grabbing Criminal in Handcuffs!

What the two ladies viewed and experienced became fodder for the School of Flaunt, so much money, such bad taste and oh those terrible manners. Something had to be done! Hence, The School of Flaunt Handbook was born. Read More

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Plastic Surgery, The Good, The Bad and The Ugly!

Category: SOF Divas’ Diaries ®  |  Permalink

Published: Tuesday, May 24, 2011

Due to some hidieous plastic surgery results we have recently viewed, we felt the need to repost a small portion of The School of Flaunt Handbook that addresses such. Read on.

 

School of Flaunt

Lesson Fourteen

Plastic Surgery:

"A Stitch in Time Saves Nine, Years, That is"

One of the most serious of SOF endorsements goes to those dedicated surgeons of the Plastic variety! Why pray for miracles when you need only make an appointment?

"Oh, that this too solid flesh would melt?" Well, trust us, it can! Bob it, tuck it, lift it, but do it! Put your best face and frame forward. Plus in a number of cases your health might be improved by any of these techniques. Well, then maybe not, but you sure are going to "mentally" feel better when you look into that mirror. That's half the battle, the other is making sure that you always return for a little up keep.

Now we know that we must bring this up. What you ask? The old question of when is too much too much? Well, when your breast size looks like you should be working on your next pole dance routine. Please Ladies we know the temptation is there. You've always felt that you were, shall we say flat? Don't go over board. Do you really only want people to be looking at your breasts and not your face that you just spent all of that time and money on to make sure it looks fabulous? Do you want to be jogging and knock yourself out with those things? Not to mention, that implants can "wander"! Yes, Students, implants can take on a life of their own, moving hither and yawn. And you cannot stop them, they know it and will try to get away at any cost! Also they can contract "folds", as in implant folds. Never heard of them? Well, they do exist and let us tell you, not pretty. No plastic breast surgeon is going to give you all these dirty little implant secrets! So be forewarned. Oops, one more little problem-deflation. Yes, you heard it right. They Pop! They LEAK! and slowly die a silent death. One day you are in the shower, and you think you have lost your mind.....why am I so lopsided? Back to the Surgery Ward but quick! We won't go any further we think you have the picture now. Before we forget, if you have the opposite problem of to much please then get those breasts reduced. Your back will thank you for it and you will look so much better in your clothes. Remember gravity Ladies. You can't stop it!

As for facial surgeries, you don't want to end up looking like a "cat woman". (Yes, we are talking to all you blondes at "The Ivy" in Beverly Hills!) Meaning, pulled back so tight that if you tried to smile it would be impossible. This leads us to Botox. Yes it can be wonderful but also be very careful. We had a neighbor and his wife that always looked so unpleasant. Naturally we never made any effort to meet them. Well, we came to find out that they both got Botox on a regular basis. It was impossible for them to smile! They were permanently in a state of being frozen facially. Very, very bad!

Alas, you or your husband has had plastic surgery and the little ones resemble your former self. Fear not, after 16 those noses can be corrected just like you did. Why should any young person not avail themselves of being able to improve upon Mother Nature and heredity? Never let little juniors of either sex go through life with unpleasant features, such as crooked teeth and trophy ears. These are easily taken care of. Actually we knew of many a high school student that not only got their nose done but had their ears done at the same time. It was called a Happy Birthday present. True!

Of course, we at the SOF do not endorse breast augmentation for anyone under twenty five years of age. Besides, in many cases, it makes one look "heavy". And whatever you do, do not, we repeat, do not succumb to the pouty lip augmentation!!! Ghastly, that one.

Picture us sticking our lips out!

Alexandra & Cate

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